The next Generation

I keep on feeling beter and beter since I am open about my HIV to my children. Saturday I was invited to HIV positive women activities in Sittard. Mothers who have children were allowed to bring them along. I thought that it would be more for very young kids from 0 to 8. I asked if it was ok to bring my youngest son of 10. Of course he is welcome. That was the answer from the organisation for then activities. So it was my turn to check with my son Akira if he is interested to join me. He had 3 choices. First to join his big brother Rio and his father to go train spotting at Lage Zwaluwe where Rio was going to film all trains. This is his hobby since he was 2 years old. The second choice was to go play with his friend, and the third was to join mama to the women HIV activities.

Guess what he chose? He wanted to join me. I asked him if he is sure about going to Sittard, sitting 2 hours in a train and join the belly dance. His answer was: “Mama I want to support you in many things you do regarding fighting stigma, connecting with other people with the same condition as you. I am not ashamed being around you in public, you are my mom and my most beautiful and courageous mom I have ever seen in my entire life”. Well not that he is very old... only 10years. But this brought tears to my cheeks. Then he asked “Mom are you crying? Did I say something sad or did I offend you?” I said “no my dear, these are tears of joy”. I know that all the energy I put in this fight will not be for nothing, because  even if I will not be able to continue you will pick up what was left.

So we went with our train to Sittard. We met great people, I had a nice chat. Some women knew me only via my facebook positive posts. Some had read my stories on Hello gorgeous and were so happy to meet in person. So we hugged, and laughed together. What happened to my son AKIRA?

Well, he already met 3 kids he knew from Positive kids family weekend. So they were playing together, and sometimes he would come around and give me that ‘I love you mom kiss’ and I would hear him and other kids playing piano.
I was excited to do the belly dance. It is something totally different from African dance that I am used to do as a professional dancer. I was looking forward to learn it together with positive women and connect as I always do when I dance. What a great day, I enjoyed every single minute of it. The kids were dressed in a belly dance outfit just like their mothers. I thought maybe Akira would not join or put on the outfit. It turned out he had a lot of fun with it. He likes to dance too I guess, something he picked from me. Hahahaha.

We had a nice time together. After the dance we had nice oriental snacks and then went home.
Till now I don’t regret having told my children about my HIV status or let Akira join me in women’s group because I believe when we empower the young generation, we stand a chance of reducing HIV stigma and zero infection.
Peace,
Eliane

Educating the Educated

What would you do if you are being called an assassin, simply because you are sharing information? Here is what happened to me when I shared important information on PrEP to a seemingly well educated person...

I am sure many of my fellow Burundians are not well updated about HIV. So this week I decided to share the latest on PrEP as a pill you can take to protect you from being infected from HIV. When you are HIV negative of course. I wanted to communicate in Kirundi so that people who don’t speak English or not so good French could understand what PrEP is all about. So I posted the PrEP information in Kirundi and asked the leaders, if they learned something new, to share the post so that their friends can learn as well.

Somebody shared it on her timeline with a Belgian man with a medical background, working in Bujumbura. He demanded to explain or give a short summary what I am talking about in French. I saw we had one friend in common that is why he could see. I did not want to mix languages in this post and I wanted to keep conversations in Kirundi with Burundians. So I went through the inbox via messenger and explained that I am sharing the information about PrEP, a pill that can prevent from being infected from HIV virus. He went to look at my Facebook profile and he sent me this message” VU,VOTRE DIPLOME.JE VOIS QUE VOUS N’AVEZ AUCUNE COMPETENCE MEDICALE, SACHEZ QU’EN FAISANT CROIRE QU’IL YA DES PILULES QUI PREVIENNENT L’APPARITION DU VIH. VOUS SEREZ RESPONSABLE DE L’INFECTION ET LA MORT DES PERSONNES QUI FONT CONFIANCE. EN PARTAGEANT VOTRE IGNORANCE CRASSE, ET GAGNER DE L’ARGENT SUR CETTE ESCROQUERIE INTELLECTUELLE, EST LAMANTABLE! BON WEEKEND.”

I immediately shared with him some website that have information on PrEP, for example readily available info on CDC, SOAIDS. He did not recognize those, and instead he went further by insulting me, “ Cette escroquerie est indigne. Aucun medicament ne protege le VIH ...Vas-y. Fais ton petit business mortel. En bonne conscience. Se faire traiter d’ignorant par une petite idiote, est plutot un compliment... merci .Assassin!”

When he called me an idiot as a compliment, and an assassin, he was expecting me to just give up and look away?! I promised myself when I came out of the closet about my HIV status to never be afraid to speak out. To be a forgiving person when I meet this kind of people who think they know more and think they are highly educated and want to put me down because they believe they are better than me?

I went straight to the point and showed him that I knew what I was talking about. I gave many reasons why it is important to educate people on PrEP, not only Burundians in Burundi, but everywhere in the World. To double check if he is aware of all information, since he claimed to know about HIV. So when I asked him if he knew about U=U, he simply ignored the question and was not able to answer this correctly. So here is a man that does not know the facts about PrEP or U=U and calling me an assassin and idiot.

I decided to forgive him as I saw an arrogant man with low self-esteem and who did not want to bother to read up on the facts. I guess it was difficult for him to imagine a woman without a medical background to be smarter than him. Well, mister, my education level is good enough to study and understand live-saving information and share this with my community.
I will never give up because those kind people. What I will continue to do, is educating them, show them the way  to communicate. If you are an educated person and you see somebody sharing wrong information, the first thing you do is correcting that person. NOT INSULTING. In this way you can show the World that you are better educated!

This showed me how much stigma and ignorance there still is in this World, even amongst well educated people. They will melt down the moment we stand up against bullies and promote  U=U, PrEP as tool to fight stigma and discrimination.

I live to Empower, Inspire and Educate.

Peace ,
Eliane

Embrace!

I have been thinking the easy way to share some of the important guidance to people who have just been diagnosed with HIV. I did not have a chance a few years ago when I was diagnosed, there was no internet where people could read information.It was doctor words against my words.I did not get any advice So here I can help after my 15 years of living with HIV.

The first thing to do after you find out your HIV status is to search for informations instead of start counting the days left for you to die with negative thoughts.
Embrace your HIV status .You are lucky to find out because with right medications you will live a long, healthy life like anyone else.
Don't fight it, it won't help you it will only put you down.

Be Positive and don't change who you are .HIV is just a chronic disease.It is manageble for people who aware of their status.
It is not the end of the World and please don't think anyone can smell that you are HIV positive .It is also not written into your face .
Take it easy and you don't have to be open about it only when you feel you are READY.
So please make peace within yourself and get ready because once you are out of the closet ,there is no turning back. STIGMA out there will be waiting for your response.You need a strong positive mind  to fight back against any Stigma and discrimination around HIV and AIDS.
Be sure you are ready for this!

Yes your Freedom is your Right but not always this is the case.Sometimes we need to take it slow and see how far we get!
Be positive Be you!
Peace !
Eliane

The Hills of Gahwazi

Tuesday with ASSEJEBA team went to visit the Batwa from Gahwazi 2 in Mpanda Commune ,Bubanza Province.
It's a place of Hills only,the car could not get us to the houses where Batwa live.
So we walked 6km climbing till on top.
I have never done it before.In Gihanga is plat like in Netherlands (Pays-Bas)where there is no single mountain.It was a great sport for me.

The welcome is dancing and singing from Youth choire and Vibrant women group.
Every time is very special for me!

My introduction is always the same. Asking what they know on HIV and Aids.
According to them HIV is a desease you get from cheating on your relationship. How to prevent HIV ,You can stop having sex.
I asked if they ever seen someone with HIV .Their ansuer was yes .The person with Aids has big head,thin arms and a skin infection (Zona)
So we talked many other ways of getting HIV ,the Prevention and treatement.
I reminded them of not ruling out the case of rape for women and girls an other way of high infection in our community.They agree with me.
Then I started sharing my HIV story.They were surprised when I showed my medications.It was a urge opening !
All the children and parents were listening careful and asked many questions regarding the HIV MYTH within Batwa community.
According to Batwa of Gahwazi2  a Mutwa has HIV when he can not produce the pot (Kubumba Inkono).
My story did change  how they vieuw a person who live with HIV.

The Chief of Batwa with emotions did explain the gratitude he had to be able to see me being open and give them education. He said in his words"I have heard from people who came once to talk about the prevention on HIV and Aids,I have got many informations but I have never seen in person someone with HIV open and share this inspiring story.We see she tell the truth ,she has shown us medication.We are lucky to have her here  Thank you Eliane for choosing the Batwa.We are convinced that Knowing your status is the basic for planing our future and development. (ITERAMBERE) God bless you"

We finished by distributing the Excices books to 193 children.
We left them with smile faces.

Peace,
Eliane

The Children of Murira.

Today I went to give education on Hiv and Aids to children from Primary school MURIRA1 in Gihanga Commune.
It was great to see all the changes after many years. A lot of houses have been builded and new schools which were not there when I was young .
What chocked me is that some chidren are seating on the floor because the chairs are not enough or broken.It made me cry to see them in those  conditions.

I was welcomed by the Headmester and two teacher of 6th term primary school.
During introduction I told them that I am a native of Murira and they very curious to Know what brought me back there.

I started by asking  different questions relating on what is Hiv , Infection and prevention. They responden very well and have  asked many questions . There was a very good interraction betwen class.
We learn about stigma around  HIV and Aids , the important of testing.
We close our class by making drowing competition for the Anti stigma.

While I walked outside I saw this boy on foto who has been listening all my talking through the Window.He asked me ." Hiv can not take my talent of playing my favoriet football right?"I said not at all!" He thanked me again for being honest with them in class.
I have a good souvenir from this Burundian Hand made ball from my village.

Peace
Eliane